This morning

You could have pulled a gun on me and I would have laughed at you. Nothing I've ever experienced even remotely compares to my anxiety over these test results. I have never been so afraid of anything in my entire life.
But the news is good! She has only the one mass that we knew about and nothing more. Her mother hugged the doctor, which was awkward... but I wanted to do the same thing.
She is so strong and amazing. This will be a bad memory before we know it.


Cousin Karla said…
HOORAY!!! That's fantastic news. Michael and I are SO relieved for you all.
jim nelson said…
Ryan...Thank you soooo much for taking care of my little girl. You and she both mean the world to me!
r'n'r-RN said…
both of you are strong and amazing.
jim nelson said…

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.
It turns what we have into enough, and more.
It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity...
It turns problems into gifts, failures into success, the unexpected into perfect timing,
and mistakes into important events.
Gratitude makes sense of our past,
brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow."

From my friend, Michael Gerber.
UltraDawn said…
yay! phoebe wins! i knew it!
Anouschka said…
That's awesome news!!! I almost cried when I read this... what a relief!
Jim Dustin said…
Just huge, great news Ryan and Phoebe! Now you can get down to the mechanics of radiation and the chemo. My wife was fitted with a port, which is just a fixed IV under the skin to facilitate hooking up for blood samples or receiving chemotherapy easier. Hers is up near the collar bone as she still gets some designer drug maintenance for a few more months every few weeks. She had her Chemo administered with a little pump, about the size of an older digital camera. It was juiced up for running five days at a time 24/7 in tiny, steady doses and carried with a shoulder strap like a purse. Weekends it came off friday afternoon and then repeated on Monday for several weeks. Her cocktail was primarily 5-FU. There are so many kinds, but if this is your therapy, my wife tolerated it very well. She could move around, but limited visitors and/or exposure to germs like going to a store. She was also given Zofran, which is an expensive, anti-nausea drug - which she was never sick once in 5 weeks. Insurance gave me a limited amount, but we augmented it with another anti-nausea drug (Ativan) that makes you a little drowsy as it's also a tranquilizer. You have to ask for these and be sort of firm that you do NOT want to be nauseous. My wife was actually more scared of being nauseous than having cancer! Go figure :) Also if it is 5-FU, her hair never fell out - only got slightly thinner in diameter. If it does, the local American Cancer Society will provide brand new wigs or scarf wrap hats for the asking. Just an easy sign up. Anyway, isolated tumor is (strangely) fantastic news and you are going to do great no matter what the docs are planning! Best thoughts and prayers to you both!
jim nelson said…'re the best. Thanks for all of your valuable information. Medical marijuana is not yet allowed in Ohio, but I have spoken with several people who have found relief from that source, as well Of course, we managed to find a lot of that relief back in the 70's! Haha. Thank you sooo much for contributing! With love and respect....j
Ryan said…
legal schmeagal. I'm going to need a bag of weed just for me!

Her chemo is Cisplatin once a week. They have given her scrips for ativan some other unpronounceable anti-nausea drug... they will be giving her zofran with the IV from what I understand. The chemo is not particularly severe, it is to make the radiation more effective. They do not anticipate hair loss at all, but I'll have the sammy hagar wig ready anyway.

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