Chemo 5 (Yesterday)
I got some good news and some bad news yesterday during my 5th chemotherapy session.
We'll start with the bad to just get it out of the way. What I was hoping might be my LAST chemo yesterday, was actually number five of SIX. They originally told me it was 5 to correspond with the five weeks of radiation, but because of scheduling, my radiation sessions were split up into 2 short weeks and 4 regular ones. So yeah. One more chemo. I mean, I guess that's not REALLY bad news. I'm getting to be a pro at managing the nausea and am actually getting BETTER at making myself eat even when I don't want to (though I'm still dropping weight - but not TOO much, luckily). The worst part is... [WARNING: this is where the humiliating nature of the location of this cancer and the surrounding areas and their functions have become SUCH a ridiculous part of my daily life, that I've lost all decorum when it comes to what may or may not be considered "TMI". So if you don't want to read about my unpleasant side effects, I suggest skipping ahead to the next paragraph.] Ok, what was I saying? Oh... yeah. The worst part. The worst side effect of the chemo that I cannot seem to sort out is constipation. My poor butt has never been this unhappy. I'm trying softeners and laxatives and even some "Smooth Move" tea. And while I DO "go" - the goes are the size of grapes and come with the pain of mangoes. Sucks.
But yeah. That is really the only side effect of the chemotherapy that I completely hate hate hate. The other stuff has been manageable and, while it's ALL unpleasant, it is all fixing me. And THAT is worth every last wince and grumble and cry.
Now, yesterday's GOOD news. While I was sitting in the chemo chair, I received a call from the internal radiation office with my treatment dates! We did not think I'd get those dates for another couple days, so I was very excited. There are 5 treatments, and the first is on Monday the 19th (just five days after my final external radiation). But the best date is the LAST treatment, which is January 3rd. An end date! A countdown! Something to truly look forward to!
I cannot wait.