Crappy Cancerversary...

Well here we are.  November 2nd.  One year ago today, right about NOW, actually, Nurse Erin came into my room at Fairview Hospital and told me I had cancer.

I cannot believe all that has happened in those 365 days.  How much I have changed.  How much I have grown.

I am still furious at the universe for fucking up this weekend of revelry for me and I am seriously struggling to try to remain positive in light of all that is going on.  My emotions have been swinging wildly the past couple days, nevermind the last few HOURS.  I am furious at the power company for choosing streetlights over homes as they work ever so slowly to restore power in our poor city.  And I do mean out POOR city... as it appears that all of the wealthier suburbs were reconnected to the grid first - but the poor little ghetto of Cleveland has been left on the back burner.  Looking at the First Energy website, it appears that they have Cleveland slated to be back on SUNDAY.  Neat.  So much for a stress-free weekend getaway.  Furious.

But despite my anger, (and mostly because my husband would not let me cancel it) my Cancerversary party tonight is still on.  My stomach is in knots about it, and in light of my darling Spencer's recent news I hardly feel like celebrating... but the show much go on.

So on it goes.  Ryan is at home washing glasses.  I am going to pick up some ice and candles on my way home.  And we'll see what happens.  And if the generator finally gives up mid-celebration, well - it's a short walk to Der Braumeister and they seem to have power.  And booze. (So if you show up and it's dark, look for a note on the door telling you where we'll be!!)

Meanwhile, I will keep thinking about the TED video we watched yesterday at my GYN cancer support group.  And I will remember that overall, this year truly has been the best gift I have ever received...

Love love love, Phoebe


Anonymous said…
I love reading your posts, Phoebe!
You are always in my thoughts :)
xo, Mush

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